This week was trying to eliminate the anger and frustration that surrounds me. I have been having Strange dreams one was fighting with my sibling telling them where to go and the other was saving their life. I have felt they were the favorite child and always got spoiled. I was left on the back burner and always had to give up my room when company came to stay.
Given I was a strong willed child and did things my way and didn\’t care what you had to say to me.I was told I would fail at everything which some of that was true .
I failed at getting the best education I could because I took the easiest path and turned away from what mattered most and settled for less because I didn\’t believe I deserve better.
Don\’t feel sorry for me this course is about chipping away at the concrete forgiving others, fill your heart with love, giving more.
When you hold onto all the S**T from the past it destroys your future. You can\’t grow with hate it pulls you down and you drift into the the black whole, weather it be drug use or alcohol the low self-esteem and blaming everyone else for where you are and where you should be.
I can\’t look at I should have done that or this I can only take today and make it the best day ever leaving my past buried and the future to be played out just focusing on my present day. None of what happened in the past matter it happened but it doesn\’t define the person I am today.
My garden is starting to flourish with everything I want in my life and giving back more then I have but the joy that comes form that is rich all in itself, forming good habit, sticking to my promises and completing my daily task makes me a very happy person.
Keep shining Bright